Why not enjoy it?

Today at lunch I was reading a book by Joyce Meyer called Power Thoughts.  The premise of the book is that the right attitude about life can help you not only to draw close to God, it can keep you in a place of presentness and contentment with your life. Taking the time to find pleasure in your daily activities, can bring peace to your life.

I used to see my life in the negative.  I would HAVE to do things, I would NOT BE ABLE to have what I wanted, I would always wait for TOMORROW when things would be better. Joyce suggests that if you take the time to find joy in the activities of today, you will find peace. I concur.

After I changed my attitude about my life, I was happy.  I don't spend much time at all worrying or thinking about the past, or the future. I like to plan for the future which means making goals and working toward them, but I don't worry so much about the fine detail. I feel like God has given me the general direction, all I have to do is walk and he'll illuminate the path for me. I don't have to be in control of my life to the nth degree, but I do have to choose to live today like it is my last. Each activity that I choose to do, I enjoy. Even when it is something that I must do, I try to be grateful that I am able to do it. Like exercise, this way of thinking takes awhile to get proficient at, each time you choose to take the positive position on your life, the easier it is to do next time. Eventually I hope to have to think hard to come up with something negative instead of it coming so easily to me.

Do you take time to be grateful to God in all things? Are you grateful for the job that you hate, because at least you have a way to feed your family?  Are you grateful for the family that you have? Even if they are hard to be with?

I think that I can say that I am in this place for the most part. Somedays it is easy to slip back into the old mindset, but I am glad that after I have my pity party, I can usually stand up, dust myself off and move forward with being grateful.

Are you enjoying today? Each and everyday? Why not start right now?

Word--- FOCUS

I was listening to KLOVE this morning and they were speaking of choosing one word to define your year. I didn't hear the first half of the conversation, but I assume that it has to do with goal setting. So while I was driving in, I was thinking what would that word be for me? Patience? Nope, learned that last year. Humility? Nope, got a great lesson in that the year before, not that I've arrived or anything, but I am not excited about the next one. Then I was thinking what do I want to accomplish this year?  Get accepted into school, be diligent with my finances, lose the last 45lbs...what word would go with that? FOCUS....

As defined by dictionary.com :
Focus- a central point, as of attraction, attention, or activity


That works...but I think there is a better definition in relation to optics:


a. the focal point of a lens-- This is what my focus is on, my goals for the year.


b. the focal length of a lens-- This is how far I can see clearly which is often not very far, I will need to concentrate on the furthest point  or goal that I am trying to see and remember that just because I cannot clearly see the end of a situation, doesn't mean it does not exist. This is where faith comes in, Do I trust God enough to just let him work out the details?


c. the clear and sharply defined condition of an image. This applies to my short term goals, the day to day process of doing what I should to achieve those things I want. Doing what is right when I don't want to. Taking one step and day at a time to work toward the ultimate goal.

d. the position of a viewed object or the adjustment of an optical device necessary to produce a clear image: in focus; out of focus--- I must remember every day to see the goal as attainable, bring it into focus, and act. 


Taking the time each day to live in the today, but with an eye on the future is how I get through the mundane activities of life.


Each day is a choice, do I live or exist? I think mostly I live. How about you?

Attitude adjustment

Wow, two days in a row. I hope it's a trend.

I have been listening to Joyce Meyer this week and she's been sharing with the audience about what we should do and why.

What I like about how the lesson that she is teaching is that she is speaking not about what we cannot or should not do, but instead to have us focus on what we should be doing. It is a much more positive way to think.

I am applying this toward my diet, as many of you know, I have been working for several years to change my lifestyle to get to a healthy weight. This week, instead of thinking I have to eat healthy, I am thinking, I'm going to eat healthy. It is a small shift in attitude, but the connotation is so much different.  Having to do something feels like a trap, planning or wanting to do something, feels like freedom.

What can you apply this principal to in your life?

Just me

It has been nearly two years since my last post. I am surprised it took so long for me to feel like I should write again. I have changed so much in the last two years, physically, spiritually and emotionally.

I was reading a post of mine from Sept 11 2008 (I think) about the word ENOUGH and my journey to change how I saw the word. I would like to report to you that I have achieved my goal of letting this word go, but that would be a lie. What I have learned these last two years was that I am enough just as I am. Whether I exercise enough, or look nice enough, or say enough of the right things...it is enough. God will help me to change those parts of me that he doesn't like, I don't have to worry about the enoughs in my life anymore.

The last two years have brought a lot of growth for me as a person. Not only am I happy and content with me, I don't feel a huge need to change everyone else in my life to fit my world view. I have learned to let my husband be who he is and do whatever he does and feel the benefits or consequences of those choices. I don't have to try and fix him. The same goes for my kids, if they ask, I advise them, otherwise I make an effort to let them make their decisions too. I think as a mother it is easy to feel responsible for the choices that your family makes. Their decisions affect how the family does or does not work together, and it feels like we are responsible to make it work as good as it can. What this ends up making us is the outsider in our family. We are ever vigilant of the innerworkings of the relationships, which means we cannot simply enjoy them. I can honestly say that now, I simply enjoy my family...as is, and it is wonderful.

I have also embarked on a new path, I am working toward a degree, a real live bachelor's degree and someday a master's degree. This is something I always wanted to do, but never felt free to pursue because it was not the responsible thing to do. Spending the money to pursue a goal, to get a job that will make less than I do now, seems ridiculous, but it has been so fulfilling. I am finding out so much about myself in this process. I am remembering that I am smart and capable. I had forgotten that.

My lifestyle has changed dramatically in that I am only home right after work on Fridays. The rest of the week, I have school or exercise. I rarely get the opportunity to take care of my husband by cooking for him, but he has done a wonderful job of supporting me as I have him for so many years. I am so thankful for him and am looking forward to the next 60 or so years together. :)

I am also learning how to take care of me without guilt. I exercise by doing yoga outside of my house a few times a week. This is a practice that takes away my stress to a large degree. While my instructor might say I am not practicing yoga if I think during it, I pray while I practice. This gives me special time with God a few days a week. Sometimes, I don't have anything to pray about and I just spend my time thanking Him for all of the blessings in my life, sometimes I pray for the strangers and yoga friends in the room, other times, I am praying fervently to God for answers to situations in my life. The prayer keeps my spirit and attitude in line while the yoga changes my body and mind simultaneously. Many Christians are concerned with the practice of Yoga and to be honest, it is wonderful to be cautious. The studio that I practice at does not bring the religion of yoga into the room, so I feel safe practicing there.

I feel like I have so much to say, but I am rambling, so for now I will close.

Healing the heart

Hello dear friends. I have been missing for quite awhile, I apologize. I have been working on healing my heart of my past and present. I have a wonderful counselor named Sally who has helped me find a bit of a direction and she'll be helping me plan for the future. She's awesome, a Christian, and downright nice lady. I have really hated looking at myself honestly, but by doing so, I am growing and changing and readjusting to my life in a positive way. So while I haven't been here pouring out my heart to you, I have been doing it elsewhere.

I have found a book that has been so helpful in my journey. It's called Boundaries. I highly recommend it.

We are preparing for Kait to leave the nest. We've enrolled her officially in college and she'll pick her classes at her orientation in June. It is at once exciting and sad. The end to a chapter of her life and ours, yet a beginning.

Shelli

Happy New Year

Hello Friends!

I've missed you. I am not doing well with keeping up my blog, but I'll check in and report as things happen.

First of all Happy New Year!


This is going to be a most wonderful year for me and my family, I'm sure of it!

Kaitlin, my eldest, has tried out for the school musical since I last reported. She got one of lead parts! The musical is "Once Upon a Mattress". Her role is the Queen. Having not seen the show ever, my supposition is that she is the mother to the prince in the princess and the pea story. The show is at the end of February. I'm so happy for her, she needed this! I keep telling her how great she is a singing and she keeps saying..."I'm okay". It is nice for her to receive the confirmation.

She has also settled on a college and is in her final semester of high school so she's on top of the world.

Maddi is looking forward to this summer when she'll be a nanny. Mainly because at the end of the summer, she'll be able to buy her own car.

My first resolution for the new year is to practice what I preach. I am really great at giving advice, not so great at walking the walk. So this year, my goal is to walk the walk. Whether it be in the area of finances (I am going to be taking the Good Sense budget course at church), relationships, health or work, my goal is to do my best in all areas. I have been coasting for awhile and it's time to get serious. Not that I'm looking for perfection, but certainly putting effort into these areas will improve my outlook on my life.

My second resolution is to work hard at not having to be right all of the time. I need to give myself room to be wrong.

That's it, 2 is enough. I'm sure I could come up with a huge list, but then I'd forget them. So 2 it is.

I saw my Dad and his wife Leslie last weekend. It was a nice time. We went to lunch and got to know each other a little better. She's a very nice lady, so it's easy to like her. My Dad is happy, and that's good enough for me.

My brother and I will celebrate Christmas together tomorrow. We are keeping it simple and having soup instead of a great big meal. I'm sure we'll have a wonderful day. I miss seeing him more often like we used to. We both have very busy lives and often forget to connect with each other, which is too bad. That's part of my resolution to work on my relationships.

I'm rambling so I'll go and get to work on things around here. Have a wonderful day.

S.

Holidays

I hope that everyone had a wonderful holiday weekend. We did. We went to our friend's house to spend Thanksgiving Day. Today we'll be having Thanksgiving dinner with my brother and his family.

When the holidays come around, it is easy for me to focus on what I didn't have growing up. What I tend to forget is that even in those holidays that were not what I wanted them to be, there were nice little things that we did do. My mother and us kids would make ornaments for our tree. My mom would go and buy sequins, styrofoam balls, beads, and straight pins. We would all sit around the table and make special ornaments for that year's tree. Then we'd make popcorn garlands for the tree while we drank hot chocolate and told Mom what we wanted for Christmas. I had forgotten about this little tradition, as it ended when I was in 6th or 7th grade, until Friday morning when I was out shopping with my friend. I hadn't been able to bring any money to spend on Christmas gifts that day and was feeling a bit bummed, we were in the ornament section and something I saw on the display tree reminded me of those times. God is so good to remind me of these things that were nice during the holidays when I was growing up.

What special traditions do you and your family have for the holidays?

My favorite dish on Thanksgiving is not Turkey. In fact, I ate only one small bite. I prefer to eat the sides and desserts. Sweet potatoes and Green bean casserole are my favorites. Oh and the canned cranberry sauce that comes out whole. It just doesn't taste the same if it is not in the can shape with the lines from the can there to cut by. :)

What's your favorite dish?

In a week or so, the girls and I are going to my friend Laura's house to make Christmas candy. I love trying to come up with new things to make each year along with the old favorites. My favorite to make is truffles, being that they are chocolate and cream, how can you go wrong with that?

Do any of you make Christmas candy to share with friends and family?